Entries from May 2010 ↓

MONDAY

• First day of observation at my new job, and a training session which turned out to be a review of my Psychology of Reading class.
• AJ’s 2nd birthday and her laughing at me whenever I said, “jejejeje.” Tiny arms wrapped aroung my neck for a clingy hug.

TUESDAY

• Observed three little students at the Ortigas location, which is just a skip away from a happy place.
• Watched the Trumpets’ Master Class with MTA classmates for free. Beginning of my “Taylor the Latte Boy, bring me java, bring me joy” LSS. I am inspired.
• Date with an ate and got an earful of much needed unorthodox advice.

WEDNESDAY

• Sabbath moved to midweek. Anointing.

THURSDAY

• Time to shine! Runner girl extraordinaire.
• Bonding time with a long-lost prayer partner.

FRIDAY

• Heard three little lion cubs roar in Tagalog and made very colorful lion hand puppets
• An opportunity to exercise discernment
• Laughed in the rain and got thoroughly soaked with a younger sister. Enjoyed kimchi and May-December stories too.

SATURDAY

• The stars and the full moon.
• Bonding with PCCI younger siblings while doing what we do best: servant-leadership (and having fun at the same time)

SUNDAY

• Rita, pumayat ka. (more than once, hurrah!)
  
• Home-cooked meals (dahil nga raw pumayat na ako…)
• 1 minute drizzles and a HUGE rainbow

Thank You, Lord for a wonderful last week of May.

I’ve heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true
But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you…

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You’ll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend…

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you

Because I knew you

I have been changed for good
And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness

For the things I’ve done you blame me for
But then, I guess we know

There’s blame to share
And none of it seems to matter anymore

Who can say if I’ve been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better

Because I knew you…
I have been changed for good…

(from Wicked)

Music is said to be the sound of feelings. And as summer 2010 (and the craziest 12 months of my life) draws to a close, this is my heart song:

For those who taught me how to face my fears. For those who faced those fears with me. For those who showed me how to love something so passionately that they showed me the way to love it too. For those who allowed me to do things I never taught possible. For those who invited me to be caught up in the winds of change. For those who challenged me to grow deep and grow roots. For those who dared me to be vulnerable and take risks. For those who put up with my restlessness, my lack of direction and my awry sense of timing. For those who affirmed my calling. For those who made me feel beautiful. For those who taught me to confront my brokenness. For those who pushed me off the deep end. For those who were not afraid to show honest emotion. For those who made me realize, that yes, I have a heart. For those who keep reminding me to pray, to wait, to hope, to love.

Hello, and ’til we meet again.

Any time you laugh
Any time you cry
Any time you hear a sound
When you’re on the grass
Lying on the ground
Any time you wash your hands
I’ll be around

I’ll be there on the baseball field
Though I’m well concealed
I’ll be out there cheering
I’ll be there in the books you read
It is guaranteed
I’m not disappearing fast
Any time
No not any time

And I am there each morning
I am there each fall
I am present without warning
And I’m watching it all
Yes I’m watching it all
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
And I am there in music
I am there in sky
I don’t why this thing did happen
But this much is clear
Any time or anywhere
I am there

Any time you pray
Any time you fight
Any time you’ve gained a pound
Any time it’s day
Any time it’s night
Any time the earth moves
I’ll be around

I’ll be there in the maple trees
I’m a summer breeze
On a perfect evening
I’ll be there when you celebrate
When the world seems great
I’ll be waiting by your side
Any time
Yes! Any time

And I am there each morning
I am there each fall
I present without warning
And I’m watching it all
Yes I’m watching it all
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

And I am there in flowers
I am there in snow
I don’t know why this thing happened
But this much is clear
Any time you cry
Any time you sing
For anything
I’ll be there
Each morning
I’ll be there each fall
I don’t why this thing happened
But this much is clear

Be aware
I am there
I am there
I am there
I am there

For our Musical Theater recital last May 22, we sang this song (see photo) from William Finn’s Elegies. Originally, it is sung by the spirit of a parent who died in the September  11 attacks to her orphaned children.

In keeping with or show’s theme, we changed the lyrics to make it a song from God. Once again, I am reminded that in the every day things, the small joys, the unseen tears, the perplexing problems, the silent beauty and the grand events, He is there. Always.

You may not know why this thing happened
But this much is clear

Be aware
I am there

I remember what you said
I remember every word
I remember how the earth stopped turning
We were sitting on the bed
And the clock was ticking louder
There’s the overwhelming smell of powder in the air
Everything is skewed
Everything is blurred
I remember every word

I remember how we roared
Laughed so hard we almost cried
Laughed so long I felt the earth stop turning
We were never ever bored
And you made us feel amazing
We were blazing through our lives like comets through the sky
Now that you’re not here
Everything’s awry

The world is good you said
Enjoy its highs you said
The summer flies you said
So make a parade
Of every moment
Now throw away your hate
And focus on what’s great instead
I’m dying so there’s no time for debate
You said

I remember how you smiled
You were trying not to smile
Then you smiled and the earth stopped turning
All the images are filed
All the images keep flicking
Also all of us are slow at picking up our cues
Nothing left to win
Nothing more to lose

The earth is good she said
Enjoy its shit she said
‘Cus this is it she said
So make a parade
Of every moment
Now pull up to the curb
The sign Do not disturb’s ahead
The truth is that you made my life superb
She said

On a Sunday night in May
In a very quiet way
I remember how the earth stopped turning
Turning
Turning
Turning!

(William Finn, Elegies: a Song Cycle)