Will you be there?

In our professionals’ retreat, we talked about what it meant to be in a community. To be a member of a family, to be part of a church, to work with others, to have friends, and so on. People who are part of our lives not just because of convenience, but because they were meant to be.

I took stock of all the connections and groups that I have been a part of for the past quarter century. An apt song from MJ shows what almost 26 years’ worth of relationships have meant to me:

Hold me
Like the river Jordan
And I will then say to thee
You are my friend

They encourage me to walk through parted waters and claim His promises. They remind me of  the breakthroughs that are yet to come, but will. They inspire me to become a better person and live out the victory that is already ours.

Carry me
Like you are my brother
Love me like a mother
Will you be there?

They are not afraid to have knowledge and experience of who I am. To get personal, to be involved, to share confidences with, to be intimate. Off with the pretense and on with reality.

Weary
Tell me will you hold me
When wrong, will you scold me
When lost will you find me?

And they got close enough for discomfort. For my vulnerabilities to show. To realize that I am not perfect. I get tired, cranky, make mistakes, and I can be misled. Yet they accept these, forgive, and stay.  When I fall, they help me get back on my feet and set me straight. Rather than the kisses I prefer, they care enough to give me the wounds I need instead. They do not give up hope.

But they told me
A man should be faithful
And walk when not able
And fight till the end
But I’m only human

Everyone’s taking control of me
Seems that the world’s
Got a role for me
I’m so confused
Will you show to me
You’ll be there for me
And care enough to bear me

Right now, I am overwhelmed by unrealistic expectations, mixed emotions and contradicting advice.

Right now, they are my sanity. They remind me to take it one step at a time.  To let go and let God. To rest and have breathing space. To follow my passion and express it with joy. To ignore dignity and just let out the outpourings of a grateful heart.

And with them here, things are better. Through them, I feel blessed:

hold me
lay your head lowly
softly then boldly
carry me there

lead me
love me and feed me
kiss me and free me
I will feel blessed

carry
carry me boldly
lift me up slowly
carry me there

save me
heal me and bathe me
softly you say to me
I will be there

lift me
lift me up slowly
carry me boldly
show me you care

hold me
lay your head lowly
softly then boldly
carry me there

lead me
love me and feed me
kiss me and free me
I will feel blessed

Moment of truth. When it is their turn to ask me, can I reciprocate? Lord, help me to say with conviction: Yes, I will be there.

(spoken)
In our darkest hour
In my deepest despair
Will you still care?
Will you be there?
In my trials
And my tribulations
Through our doubts
And frustrations
In my violence
In my turbulence
Through my fear
And my confessions
In my anguish and my pain
Through my joy and my sorrow
In the promise of another tomorrow
I’ll never let you part
For you’re always in my heart.