I miss going to my home church’s midweek service, also known as PrayerWatch. Back in the days when my schedule was sane, Wednesday nights were spent in praise and worship, prophetic prayers, and of course bonding with the CYFers. But frequent overtime, night shift and MA evening classes kept me from coming regularly.

I finally had a chance to reconnect tonight. Guess what the message was about? God is constantly calling people. Bull’s eye. Pastor Bing focused on the “struggle” part of calling, especially in the case of Nathanael (John 1:43-51) and Jacob (Genesis). The latter, in particular, had his name changed to Israel, which means “one who wrestles with God and with man.” And one who overcomes.

Here are the bullets that hit home as I listened to the message:

Wrestling with God means:

1. to let God know you are having a difficult time
2. to face up to God with your true self (sin, motives, doubts)
3. to exert effort to know God’s will
4. to ask God questions
5. an honest sprititual search

When does wrestling with God happen?

1. prayer
2. study of the Scriptures
3. meditation
4. thoughtful consideration of our actions
5. seeking God’s truth in circumstances

 

What are the results of wrestling with God? - spiritual honesty

1. we come out broken of pride, fully surrendered to God
2. we are cleansed of our sins… and of contradictions or “pagkukunwari” in our calling
3. we confirm God’s will for us and answers to prayers
4. we cross-over / change
5. we catch a glimpse of Peniel, the face of God

I am wrestling with God about so many things right now… but none as hard as in the area of my calling. I know what I have to do. Convincing my heart is another matter altogether.

Lord, I will not let go until You bless me…